


Obituaries for two blackbirds

by Mistropolis



Series: Through mist and lives and pain and hope [7]
Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Multi, Spoilers, Time Loop, don't read unless you know the whole game
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-22
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2019-01-20 05:40:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 16,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12426159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mistropolis/pseuds/Mistropolis
Summary: [ major v3 spoilers ]While all have taken their stride out of pain and suffering, the roads Toujou and Kiibo must take remain non-linear and ever-shifting.Such is the fate of blackbirds and abandoned children.





	1. the servant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In advance, I would like to say that I'm so sorry for this mess.
> 
> This is the first chapter of the timeloop. Next would be Kiibo's loops, and the third chapter would finally unite the two. For now, they are both gonna suffer alone.
> 
> Again, I'm so sorry for writing this.

Toujou doesn’t realize the wrongness enfolding around her until the blood splatter on Amami’s head becomes faded, evidence of the time passing.

“Toujou-san? Aren’t you going to investigate?”

Shirogane’s voice completely wrecks Toujou’s self-inflicted trance. “Oh. Right. My deepest apologies, for zoning out at such inappropriate times.”

Shirogane smiles at that. “It’s alright, Toujou-san! Let’s just do our best!”

Toujou unconsciously gets into a guarded posture and proceeds to examine Amami’s body. For her lack of experience in investigating bodies, she should still do her best.

 

.

 

Kiibo watches the chaos of this “trial” unfurl into a full-blown pandemonium. All students are animated in their desperate fight for survival, except the silently crying Akamatsu and Saihara, polemics flying around the courtroom.

But it doesn’t take long before they settle down to a hushed conclusion. An obdurate, unyielding conclusion that clamps around Akamatsu’s neck like a guillotine rope.

Colloquies of regret traded, the only thing Kiibo could hear through the furor is declared with a determination.

“I will do my utmost to fulfill your final request.”

Kiibo does not listen to his inner voice regarding that statement.

 

.

 

The motive pad sits there, taunting her with a slick of information ready to lead her astray.

To protect everyone, Toujou figures she should understand her own weakness, and she turns the screen on.

 

.

 

Kiibo watches Toujou running at full speed towards the exit. His optical sensors detect a fleeting second of her expression written with despondency and utter despair, and he wishes he could delete the information.

Toujou runs and runs but in the end Monokuma gets her and then everything ends

 

 

 

and Toujou wakes up in a locker.

>

Toujou wanders around the school, or shall she say, the site of an upcoming mutual killing game.

{{ _why is this happening?_ }}

Every grime on the wall and every crack in between Saihara’s voice is the same. The Monokumars appear before all sixteen of them without fail and announce the killing game and just as expected everyone is clustered and everyone is separated and Akamatsu and Saihara are off to their little expedition, their confabs brimming with a strong aching need and hope and despair but mostly hope.

Toujou stomps out the little wisp of fire burning her heart.

She had made a mistake once. No, more like twice. The mistake of not realizing Akamatsu planning an erroneous murder and the mistake of deciding to murder on her own.

{{ _don’t think about how you’ll fail don’t think about the fact that you too have dirtied your hands don’t think about the more potential of mistake don’t think._ }}

The camera flash is the main reason why Amami is lured to the spot where he dies. And so Toujou rushes to the library, with a small wrench she stole from Iruma’s lab. She locates the camera and starts pummelling the head into the lens, which immediately breaks with a satisfying crack.

“Toujou-san?”

Toujou turns back this time to see Amami staring at her instead of Shirogane. “What are you doing?”

Toujou stuffs the wrench into her pocket, gambling for a chance that Amami did not exactly see what she’s doing, even when it could become obvious so easily. “Nothing, I, I’m just, like looking for a certain book I can’t quite remember. It’s, ehhh,”

“Were you breaking something?”

Toujou draws in a breath that is all too indicative of the fact that Amami had hit the jackpot of the question. Amami frowns, walking towards her urgently.

[[ **stop stop stop stop stop stop stop** ]]

“Amami-kun, don’t come any closer or I s-swear, Toujou sticks herself flat to the bookshelves.

“What, what will you do Toujou-san? What is it that you are hiding?”

“Just, just stop coming any closer or―”

The sound of a falling metal ball registers too late, for when it does Toujou has already taken the shot. It cracks her skull open just as the shadow of a relatively tall girl springs from behind Amami, another metal ball claiming yet another life.

 

.

 

Kiibo checks his memory bank and wonders why his inner voice advises strongly against doing so. The files contained inside record what he saw and experienced mainly based on time frames, like 9:23:48 to 9:30:27 when he accompanied his classmates and politely declined Ouma’s offer of motor oil for breakfast, and 12:25:34 to 12:26:45 when everyone finally gathers for the body discovery.

Kiibo takes close record on his own on the absences of several time slots that should not have been empty in his memory bank.

He walks over to the small altar the other students have made for Toujou, wondering how her life had been wasted away by Akamatsu. Would her ghost answer why she was hiding in the library? And that why amongst the fifteen students that a maid sworn to duties would stash herself away in a closed space before she could truly offer her services as she had promised?

>

Toujou dies tragically a death with no meaning and no resolution

 

 

 

and then Toujou falls out of the locker.

>>

This time Toujou isn’t foolish enough to consider breaking the camera again. That only leads to both of them being killed last time, so Toujou will have to figure out another way to stop Amami from dying.

{{ _and hoshi._ }}

Considering the fact that Akamatsu is the one who had the initiative of killing Amami, the best she could do is to stop Akamatsu from gaining the idea to do so. To propitiate her.

Toujou walks towards the classroom where Saihara and Akamatsu have convened for more than half an hour in. It is no surprise at all when she walks in that both were still having their hushed conversations, though they conclude as soon as Toujou approaches them.

“Akamatsu-san, can I talk to you for a second?”

“S-sure, Toujou-san.” Akamatsu gets up from her spot. Toujou can’t stop seeing the penumbra of doubt in her eyes.

“Akamatsu-san, I heard that you were planning with Saihara-kun on something? Is there anything I can do to help?”

Fleeting panic flashes across Akamatsu’s countenance. “Oh, oh well not really. We have our plans to carry out on that is best for just the both of us to do. Sorry about that.”

{{ _no you are losing her say something tug her down_ }}

“But what if you got the wrong one―” The use of this phrase didn’t really sink in until they are already spoken and Akamatsu had already heard.

“What, what the wrong one?”

“The…” Toujou lets her heart wander to depths she hadn’t considered before. Complete mobocracy floors her as the slew of “what if you picked the wrong one to have your heart?” materializes instead of what she had bitten down.

Akamatsu blushes all but for one second before her trademark smile appears yet again. “Toujou-san, you definitely do know how to make a joke! I bet that comes with the skillset of being a super maid, isn’t it!”

Toujou lets herself fail this one time.

>>

As no appropriate persuasion can be done, Toujou rushes to the classroom Akamatsu is in solitarily after Saihara had run out in a panic.

“Stop. You don’t have to do this.”

The words almost cast Akamatsu―kind-hearted, driven and bright Akamatsu―into a villainous light, but Akamatsu remains as determined as before. “Toujou-san, I cannot make a single assumption as to why you would be here.”

“I’m here because you have to stop what you were doing!”

“Why should I? Why should I sit back and do nothing while the mastermind drives us to despair?” Akamatsu stands up abruptly, the metal ball still clutched tightly in her right hand. “What is wrong with doing this?”

Several methods spin around in Toujou’s head regarding on how to turn this scenario around. Hurting her physically. Slamming the metal ball off from her hand.

Toujou presses her lips to Akamatsu’s.

{{ _hey hey this is not going where it should and anyway why are you doing this do you think you could just go and do this why do you do that what is wrong with you what is_ }}

Toujou ends it as soon as Akamatsu drops the ball. She kicks it away from the vent, picking it up on her way out of the room, careful not to let herself see how vicious Akamatsu’s face would become.

The concentration is nearly strong enough for her not to hear the body discovery announcement.

>>

“So, we are here to discuss the death of Hoshi Ryouma.” Saihara quietly announces to the group.

Just as before, the courtroom is quickly taken by furious arguments.

Toujou’s posture slumps. Freezes. She resists the urge to wrap her own arms around herself and shudders and shudders and shudders.

[[ **i did it. i stopped amami from dying.** ]]

{{ _but you failed hoshi._ }}

“I, I don’t know where I go wrong,”

Amidst the chaos, Kiibo doesn’t admit that he could hear it.

“I stopped her. I stopped her from killing Amami. I stopped all traces of killing, so why? Why is Hoshi dead?”

The cacophony swallows up Toujou’s questions.

“Hoshi said that he does want to sacrifice for us when necessary, so that’s why he could possibly volunteer to be killed. But who would have done it?” Himiko raises her own question quietly.

“Kami-sama had answered that question!” Angie claps her hands together. “The life-taker of our little star issssssss―”

“Stop dragging on forever!” Ouma chimes in.

“―is obviously Rantarou!”

Kiibo watches Toujou’s face ashen further.

Amami blinks once. Twice. “What? Me?”

“Speaking of this menace, Tenko does remember him walking into the library with something like a book!”

“Kyakyakya! What was your avocado arse doing huh? Killing little star so you can leave?”

Iruma’s brash attitude and Tenko’s accusations did nothing to hit on Amami’s calm demeanor, however. “I was just going to return it, obviously.”

“How can we even be certain that it was a book? Chabashira-chan might not have the best eyesight!” Ouma all but singsongs the line, and Tenko fires back immediately. “Tenko only says what she knows to be true!”

“Actually,” Akamatsu pipes up for the first time in the trial. “Why don’t we just let Iruma-san show us what the cameras have recorded?”

It was Amami’s turn to ashen at that. “You, you have what now?”

“Evidence of your crime?” Akamatsu raises her own voice as a challenge, offhandedly glaring at everyone in the courtroom once.

[[ **she’s surely glaring at me the whole time and i don’t blame her.** ]]

Iruma excitedly brings in the retrieved photos, which clearly show Amami taking an actual thick book―a slight detail Tenko does forget―and slamming it to someone shorter than him.

“Oooh, that’s definitely Hoshi down there!” Kaito points out.

Saihara doesn’t immediately agree. “I’m wondering though; why did you have to kill someone that doesn’t make any moves of trying to explore the truth of this killing game? And who exactly are you, Amami-kun?”

Upon Saihara’s demands, Amami’s previously half-hearted smile completely curves down into a snarling smirk. “I see that you have all found your tickets to salvation.”

“So it was you… Why?” Akamatsu presses on.

“Why? Why hold this killing game, you mean? Or why I have to kill Hoshi of all people? Or,” Amami points at Toujou at that. “why did Toujou do _that_ to you?”

Toujou holds a breath that would choke her.

Akamatsu’s eyes fill with fury. “Why are you the mastermind? Why did you say all those things about stopping the killing game only to―”

“Hey, hey look here,” Amami’s smile from eyeteeth to eyeteeth stays frozen. “it’s not my fault that my master has gotten bored of this. I’m just their pawn in jump-starting the game. And anyway, to answer all of the self-proposed questions: firstly, I’m not the mastermind so I’m not at any discretion to say anything about my master’s motive. Secondly, Hoshi watched me going in to meet my master, so obviously he has to die. Thirdly, Toujou did what she did because she is a traitor too.”

Everyone shifts their gaze towards Toujou.

Toujou’s vocal cords are stuck right at that moment, as everyone slowly descends into more arguments and refutations and Akamatsu shared on what happened between them in that classroom [[ **that one gesture does mean nothing right? or am i just lying to myself?** ]] and Akamatsu accuses her of being the traitor because why else would she be motivated to do _that_ , other than to stop her from carrying out her own plan to wipe out the mastermind and so the logical conclusion is that both Amami and Toujou were the culprits and everyone clamors for their falls.

Amami smiles and Toujou forces back her sobs as all opposition to voting for them is hushed and the Exisals grab onto their backs and throw them into a spiral-like structure, and while it sucks both of them down into a drain that will suffocate them Toujou screams at the top of her lungs and _it’s not me it’s not me I was just trying to stop you from killing I don’t want to see you die again_ but all these words bounce right off of Akamatsu and Toujou has no breath to scream them anymore as the drain crush her windpipes and Toujou dies

 

 

 

and Toujou crashes her head at the door of the locker, the impact opening it slowly and earning her a bruise on her forehead.

>>>

This time every word spoken to her is empty and meaningless and Toujou only nods in tandem with what Yonaga is rambling about. Yonaga very excitedly tells her about her God and her tribe of people and offers to make Toujou a disciple of said religion. Toujou didn’t really hear every detail but she nods and nods anyway.

[[ **can your god end my suffering?** ]]

She keeps nodding and remaining silent as Saihara makes his arguments as to how Akamatsu is the one who murdered Amami.

{{ _something never changes though._ }}

 

.

 

Kiibo can distinctly hear Toujou murmuring “I will do my utmost to fulfill your final request” and he doesn’t think about how familiar the sentence is.

>>>

Toujou doesn’t examine the motive pad this time. She knows what will happen, so why does that? The motive pad will only give her a sob story inciting her to murder Hoshi and no matter how she twists the content of it around the result of watching it will be the same.

So Toujou takes a hammer and smashes it to bits.

Next, she walks up to the supreme ruler’s room.

“Oh? What does Toujou-chan want in the middle of the night?” Ouma’s mischievous simper doesn’t sit well with Toujou, but she doesn’t comment on that fact. “Could it be… You wanna murder me?”

“Absolutely no.” Toujou shoves the remains of the motive pad to Ouma, who stares at the mishmash with a shock that almost resembles childlike wonder. “I have destroyed my own motive pad. I know this is my own one, so to protect everyone I prevented myself from watching it in the first place.”

Ouma’s skeptical gaze softens somewhat as they take in the bag. “Oh Toujou-chan, that’s so nice of you to cooperate! I wish everyone else is the same!”

Last time she didn’t work with Ouma. Maybe this time?... “If you don’t mind, perhaps I can assist you in doing so?”

“You. You want to help me gather everyone’s motive pads?”

Something ties a knot in Toujou’s lungs, but she affirms. “This is a good plan to stop Monokuma from hurting us again after the last time.”

“Hmm. Toujou-chan sounds so earnest here~” Ouma juggles bits of the remains up and down. “Alright! I’d let you help!”

This can only end well this time.

{{ _and you don’t think about akamatsu’s death because it leaves you no impact whatsoever._ }}

{{ _no. it’s not like you miss her at all._ }}

>>>

“Such is the circumstance, and we would really appreciate it if you will all cooperate with us.”

Everyone stares at Toujou. Some with puzzled, baffled stares, and some with renewed suspicions. All but Harukawa speaks up about that. “Why should we trust the two of you?”

“We are only doing this for the sake of everyone.” Under Harukawa's scrutinizing gaze, Toujou does not falter nor tremble. “By giving up your motive pads, nobody will have any reason to murder.”

Harukawa has a distinctly cold smirk like a wolf. “That’s rather foolish of you to think so. What if the motive pads contain secrets that can help us get out of here? What if the secrets can help us regain our memories?”

Toujou stomps out the thought of her country before it could take roots in her conscience. “Harukawa-san, are you suggesting that even in the risk of being tempted to murder, you still crave a possible truth that much? And even if they are the truth, is it worthy enough to attempt murder?”

“Yes.”

The assertion causes everyone to let out a gasp, with the exception of Ouma, who keeps on grinning the whole time. Harukawa catches herself. “If… If the truth is really that important.”

The room is suffocated by silence before everyone continues their semblance of a daily routine, leaving Toujou and Ouma behind.

“Well, the small fragments of respect Toujou-chan commands is really upsetting! It’s like nobody listens!” With that, Ouma runs off to whatever that they do, and Toujou is left to ruminate about her failure.

>>>

Somehow, it doesn’t take much to find Harukawa again.

“What is your purpose in finding me?”

Toujou swallows. Somewhat a bit obvious, enough that Harukawa has definitely noticed. “Harukawa-san… There is something I want to confirm with you.”

“Which is?”

The words dissipate before Toujou could grasp them. “Do you. Do you really have no hesitation in murdering anyone?”

“That really depends, but I would like to think that I myself wouldn’t really stoop that low.” Harukawa keeps her defensive stance, pretending Toujou can’t notice it.

The motive pad materializes in her thoughts yet again, prompting Toujou to think back to the time when she failed to resist temptation and dirtied her hands around Hoshi’s neck. The knowledge that somebody might kill for that information…

“Harukawa-san, I respect your desire to want to go back, but this isn’t something we could ever kill for.”

Harukawa lets out a bark of a laugh. “How could you say that now, Toujou? Do you have no desire to remember who you once were? Without memories, we are not real.”

“And how exactly do you think watching the motive videos will help us in any way other than giving us the incentive to hurt our friends here? They are here to incite murder after all.”

Harukawa’s smile fades. “I don’t know about you, Toujou, but I feel like you should know the content of your video.”

Toujou holds in something of a laugh. “For what? Do you really think someone who is now convincing you not to watch it would want to watch it themselves?”

“Stop playing dumb. Give me back my motive pad.”

Toujou blinks, inquiries starting to buzz around the back of her head. “I’m sorry?”

“My motive pad. I have yours.” Harukawa takes out a motive pad and boots it up.

[[ **it can’t be it can’t be i destroyed my own how could that happen** ]]

{{ _the loops don’t always follow the rules, huh?_ }}

Flashing on the screen are the words “Motive Video for Toujou Kirumi, Super High School Level Maid” along with her silhouettes. Before the shot of her country could appear in any way, however, Harukawa shuts it down.

“Well, now you’ve seen it, I suppose you’d know that we have our pads exchanged. Just give me back mine and I’ll let you go.”

Something akin to the sensations of being clawed and sliced at creep up Toujou’s skin. “Harukawa-san, how could you be absolutely sure of that?”

“I asked around. Nobody else said that they have my motive pad and I checked them myself. That leaves you.”

{{ _would you look at your own failure? it looks like you always have more capacity for failure and being incompetent and being absolutely_ **_useless_ ** }} “Well, I think you can really guess what happened to your pad.”

“What?”

“I broke it. Do you really think that I’d let someone like you see it?”

If looks could kill, Harukawa’s snarl would send Toujou straight to the deepest level of hell. “You. Broke. It.”

“Yes, I did.”

“Did you see what’s inside? Is that why?”

{{ _you are digging your own grave_ }} “What makes you think so―”

Harukawa ceases all semblance of civilization and starts chasing her with murder in her eyes. There’s a knife in her hand.

Of course. Of course, this would be the ending stroke of the canvas of this loop. Harukawa’s shifty eyes. Harukawa’s self-proclamation of being a childcare worker spoken with bile in her tone. Harukawa’s lack of patience. Every red flag, every warning exists just inside the periphery of Toujou’s mind, but she pays it no heed because _do nothing, and maybe it will change this time? Maybe I won’t doom anyone this time?_ Because for once Toujou does not think about the possibility that somebody else is hiding secrets, because she really is just a bag of flesh and bone and obsession and asininity and no matter how hard she tries someone will die and die and die and die and it really is just a matter of time of when the victim will be her―

Harukawa sticks a knife through Toujou’s throat and she dies

 

 

 

and Toujou wakes up in a locker.

>>>>

“Toujou-san, you do sound like you have such a good talent! Being a maid does sound awesome!” There is a faint blush on Akamatsu’s cheeks, but Toujou neither comments or cogitates over it.

“Thank you… Hearing this means a lot to me.” Toujou lets herself churn out whatever that could be churned out, as long as they are not important. “Is there anything I could help you with?”

“Oh, nothing really, can’t I just want to talk to my dear classmates?”

Toujou’s simper remains intact persistently. “Of course you can, Akamatsu-san. I just figure that you might have a request for me and that’s why you would like to talk to me.”

Akamatsu stops her playful rocking at that time. “Hey, Toujou-san?”

“Yes?”

“Do you think…” Akamatsu pauses, brows knotted together, investing herself into a conversation with zero meaning. A conversation that Toujou cannot give meaning to. “Can’t you make friends with us?”

“Akamatsu-san. I’m making friends with you all by helping you the best I can. What’s wrong with that?”

“Well, I mean… Even when you do help us, we can’t connect with you at all.”

Toujou keeps her glance down as she murmurs a reply. “So, is that your request for me? To connect with you all?”

“No! What I’m trying to say here,” Akamatsu paces around in visible distress. “is that you don’t have to take it upon yourself to keep caring for us! That you don’t have to set yourself apart from us and takes so much responsibility on yourself! Please become friends with us without all these troubling you.”

Toujou pretends to understand that. “I, I see what you mean. That being said…”

{{ _you can’t say it. it will always just be a disaster because you can never really grasp anyone or impact anyone._ }}

“... Can you… Can you be my friend then?”

Akamatsu bursts into a smile immediately. “Of course! I’d be honored to be your friend, Toujou-san! Do you mind if I call you Kirumi instead then?”

“Of course I don’t mind.”

“Alright, Kirumi! You can call me Kaede instead too.”

Toujou silently tests her tongue on the syllables and decides that it doesn’t hurt at all.

[[ **am i atoning anymore? am i in control of doing anything anymore?** ]]

>>>>

“Hey, Kirumi?”

“Hmm?” Toujou tamps down the joy bubbling inside her.

{{ _you really shouldn’t be so happy about it, you know?_ }}

“Are you feeling alright? It feels like you zone out a lot.”

“Of. Of course, I’m alright.”

Akamatsu seems to be at a loss for words at Toujou’s response, until “Kirumi, can I tell you something?”

“And what might that be?”

Akamatsu stands up just a little bit on her tiptoes and presses her lips to Toujou’s.

Déjà vu crushes Toujou’s head right under waves of nausea, and it takes everything inside of her not to scream and runs off. Going as stiff as possible, however, is an action she can’t avoid doing.

Akamatsu stops it as soon as it starts. “So… I’m taking it, I mean, eh, this really is, very…”

“No, it isn’t!” Toujou unconsciously grabs Akamatsu’s hand just as she is able to scramble off. The warmth coursing through their hands surprise her; despite the thin barrier of her silk glove, there is still undeniable comfort in it. “I don’t… Want to reject you. I’m just surprised.”

Akamatsu lets out a nearly silent gasp, her face flushing up. “Do you really like me that way?... Or are you just doing this so I don’t―”

“I really do feel that way, Kaede.” The syllables radiate joy spoken out loud. “I do… Like you that way.”

Kaede has the most brilliant smile on her face as she presses her lips to Toujou’s again.

>>>>

[[ **will this just create the same conclusion again?** ]]

Toujou hears the tick-tock of the clock loud and clear, but her limbs won’t obey her will.

“Hey, Kirumi? Do you think arranging the shelves like this is good enough?”

“Yes.” [[ **don’t think about the possibility of her murdering again don’t do that don’t do that don’t** ]]

After she gets back down, the two head to the academy’s kitchen. “It must be hard to prepare our meals every day, Kirumi, so today I’m gonna help!”

“You don’t really have to do that if you have other things to do… Kaede.”

“I don’t have any! Just now I really only arrange the bookshelves a bit out of some sense of obligation, if that makes sense!” Kaede does a pirouette of sorts in her amble, her hand never once disconnected from Toujou’s.

“I’m really glad, Kaede, but―”

“Um… Toujou-san? Can I speak to you for a second?”

Shirogane appears in front of Toujou and Kaede, an inquisitive look in her eyes.

“Oh, sure, Shirogane-san.” Toujou reluctantly parts ways with Kaede, who is quietly whining and pouting as she does so. “I’ll get back to preparing meals soon, Kaede.”

“Fine… I will find other ways to surprise you then!” Kaede runs off with a vivacious beat in her steps.

Toujou endeavors to hide her smile before turning to Shirogane. “May I ask, what is it?”

“Can I talk to you in a quiet spot, just in case?”

Toujou nods, and then Shirogane gestures her to follow her back into the library.

{{ _wait what if shirogane is going to murder you too? what if she’s going to rip you away from the joy you’ve fought so hard for_ ― }}

Toujou’s posture becomes tighter. “What exactly is it?”

“Truthfully spoken, Toujou-san… I don’t think you should continue to trust Akamatsu-san.”

Drip, drip, drip. The doubt slowly but surely dribbles down Toujou’s mind. “And why exactly is that?”

“That’s because… This is my thirteenth loop and Akamatsu-san always ends up murdering someone.”

Toujou’s hands reflexively close and open, close and open. The urge to shake Shirogane and the urge to cry and the urge to scream surge through her. “You, you also are?...”

“Yes, I also am suffering from these time-loops.” Shirogane frowns and ruffles through her hair, a frustrated yell at the tip of her tongue. “I don’t know if that’s the case with you, but there’s only like, one time when Akamatsu-san didn’t end up murdering, but I think you died in that one.”

“You… You know I was framed and yet you…”

Shirogane cowers instantly. “I’m so, so sorry Toujou-san! I, I really, really wanted to help you back then, but how can I be sure that you aren’t a traitor at that time? I…” Crystalline droplets start to form around Shirogane’s eyelids. “I really just want to know who the mastermind is and I swear I wasn’t trying to condemn you too I’m so so sorry Toujou-san I’m just so―”

Toujou places a hopefully comforting hand on Shirogane’s left shoulder. Shirogane nearly lets out another yelp. “Shirogane-san, I’m sorry I blame on you like that. It’s just that, after everything that had happened in my loops…”

Shirogane gradually ceases her sobs. “It’s, it’s alright now. It’s just that, Toujou-san, it really is my advice not to talk to Akamatsu-san. I’m really afraid that if she murders again, you will only…”

The image of Kaede’s sweet, oh-so-sweet smile comes into her mind unbidden.

[[ **sometimes things had to change after all?** ]]

“But… I just can’t believe that Kae―Akamatsu-san would be up to that again. I myself am watching her quite closely―”

“Is that what you really are doing though, Toujou-san?” There’s a sinister flash in Shirogane’s glasses just now, or Toujou just works too hard and is starting to hallucinate. “Or is Toujou-san getting too clouded by her emotions? Don’t you love Akamatsu-san, Toujou-san?”

Her windpipes are being crushed (again). “I, I don’t know what you are―”

“But you do, Toujou-san! Think about it carefully, please.” Shirogane starts walking further and further away from Toujou, but the impact of her words are becoming stronger and stronger. “Think about whether Akamatsu-san is really someone you should trust.”

>>>>

Toujou kicks down at the grass for several times before leaving. Heading back to her own dorms with an excuse of sickness shouldn’t be something that’s hard to accomplish, considering how much Toujou had helped everyone in the past.

_“Should I put it that way?”_

Toujou halts. She turns back around, walking towards the source of voice,

when she sees Kaede arranging the shelves once again to form a track.

_“Okay, this should be enough… Tomorrow, I just need to distract everyone while waiting for the mastermind to come here… Yes! That’s good enough…”_

Toujou takes one step, two steps, three steps away from the library before she lets herself believe what is happening and runs back to her room.

>>>>

{{ _you can’t avoid it just admit that you are just letting yourself soften in the promise of something that can’t really exist anyway why did you try in the first place? did you really think your dear kaede will finally change her way because you mean something else to her now? you don’t, you are still just that insignificant person who merely exists to help everyone else around you to succeed, and you aren’t even good at that! what makes you think you are worth any_

>>>>

“Shirogane-san, do you know where Toujou-san has gone to?”

Shirogane points to the back end of the corridor. “Hmm, I thought she said she was going to the library to do some research!”

“Oh! Thank you for that!”

Shirogane cocks her head to the side like an owl. “Oh? What is that you are hiding, Akamatsu-san?”

Akamatsu smiles and pointedly hides the small package she had on her. “Nothing! Just a little something for my dear Kirumi!”

“Aww, you guys sure have such a good relationship, I’m so glad for you!”

“Thank you!”

>>>>

_thing you are just some cosmic plaything that the universe somehow decides is fun to play with, and you can bet even the universe is starting to get bored of you! you don’t even have any entertainment value, let alone any kind of value at all_

“Kirumi? Are you doing alright?”

_so do you know what this means? this means that you ain’t shit. it means that you should stop trying at all because your dear girl will just be up to her antics again actually come to think about it are you here to convince her to stop? how foolish and naive of you_

“Kirumi, I don’t know if you are okay, considering how long you had been in here, but! I brought you a something!”

_think about how persistent she is and come to the conclusion that you can’t do anything about it already. let it slide. admit to yourself that you are but an empty shell of nothingness and nothingness and nothingness and nothingness and_

“...Kirumi?”

 _nothingness because otherwise why would you have to do everything for everyone, live for everyone? do you once think about yourself other than_ }}

“There’s nothing wrong with me. That’s not true.”

(The blade of the boxcutter slides out.)

“Kirumi, can you answer me what’s wrong? You are worrying me―”

“There’s nothing wrong with me there’s nothing wrong with me there’s nothing―”

(The boxcutter meant for slashing down the books at the top, the ones in a formation heralding death, is now making ribbons out of flesh.)

>>>>

“I don’t have any kind of alibi that could prove my innocence.”

Toujou keeps her head down. If she lifts it up and faces everyone else, they would only see how guilty and cowardly she is through her tears.

( ~~“Kaede? Why are you...”~~ )

“Surely this is some mistake.” Saihara’s voice cracks, just like in all the other loops. “Toujou-san… How could someone as gentle as Toujou-san―”

What comes out of Toujou’s mouth can only be described as rough like a stone grating on another. “Saihara-kun, I’d suggest you not to become so sentimental at a crucial time now.”

Shirogane’s sobs come in. “But Saihara-kun is right! How could someone as gentle and sweet as Toujou-san commit that?”

( ~~“Kaede, can you hear me? Why are you covered in blood?” Toujou shakes Kaede’s limp torso. Once. Twice.~~ )

( ~~Kaede doesn’t speak. The blood covered all over her skin is flowing free, flowing into the tiny cake she brought in just earlier, the one contained in the package that had been torn open while she too was slashed open. The cake has strawberry sauce all over it, and the blood almost goes well along with it.~~ )

“It’s not entirely impossible.” Amami points to his Monopad and opens an audio file. The obnoxious soundtrack from earlier returns with full force. “Remember when Monokuma played this? It is a soundtrack that prompts us subconsciously to kill.”

( ~~“Do you enjoy my little surprise for you, Toujou Kirumi?”~~

~~Toujou looks up, and through a screen that appears out of nowhere, a face radiating madness appears.~~

~~Shirogane Tsumugi.~~

~~“Oh gosh, I bet it sucks to be played in this way, huh? Tricked by the mastermind in this manner to murder, and it has to be your own little girlfriend too! How absolutely despairful!”~~

~~“What do you mean…”~~ )

Toujou stands there, once again pelted by accusations, once again her head lost in chaos and silence.

_“So it’s true? You murdered Akamatsu-san in cold blood?”_

_“Murderer! How could you do that? To think you could have fought against it…”_

( ~~“Hey, Toujou? You wanna know something more?” Shirogane whips out a blond wig and pink sweater vest the same as Kaede’s. “Akamatsu was never going to murder in this loop! I just cosplayed her and made you think she does!”~~ )

“I know I’m unforgivable.”

[[ **i know.** ]]

[[ **i know i’m a pathetic failure who can’t even combat against my own voice.** ]]

( ~~“But seriously, Toujou, I appreciate how I don’t even need much of the soundtrack to drive you to kill. You already have done it before, after all! And the way you beautifully unravel from your own voice!” Shirogane pirouettes, a twisted ballerina made of porcelain and depravity. “Such excellent showmanship! I really enjoy that!”~~ )

“I know I don’t deserve to live so why don’t you just get to the stage of killing me!”

The courtroom is silent all at once at her outburst. Toujou breathes heavily, once and twice and thrice and four times, hiding the fact that she is heaving sobs, hiding the fact that she no longer owns a heart.

Monokuma grins and Toujou is hurtled into a coffin with roses everywhere inside. The thorns and petals tainted with poison enclose around her, enveloping around her, until Toujou’s skin is slashed away just like Akamatsu’s is, until Toujou’s heart no longer beats,

 

 

 

and then Toujou hears a kick crashing onto the locker she is locked in.

>>>>>

“I can’t believe this tightly-locked one just contains a babbling idiot like her!”

Ouma mimes throwing a stone towards Toujou, and she instinctually dodges. Ouma lets out a peal of laughter at that.

Toujou swallows down her bile and follows Ouma into the gym room. All sixteen of them are gathered there.

{{ _including shirogane_ }}

Toujou keeps her slumped posture and blank face through Monokuma’s announcement.

>>>>>

“Hey, aren’t you going to help us in any way? You are the maid after all―”

“You can either shut it, or I help you do that.” Toujou doesn’t once lift her eyes away from the book she pretends she’s reading.

Iruma growls. “You piece of shit bitch! You can either get your whorish ass to the dining hall, or you can―”

Toujou grabs onto Iruma’s jaw in a way that’s as painful as she can. Iruma struggles quite immediately, and it doesn’t really take much for her to get out of Toujou’s grip, but still, she gags and glares daggers at her. “You manic bitch… What were you…”

“I make good on my threats, and I have made my will rather clear. I have no intention of helping or interacting with any of you, as a matter of fact. Please leave me alone.”

Iruma scrambles off but won’t stop running her mouth off of Toujou.

Toujou doesn’t find anything wrong with that.

>>>>>

“Hey, Toujou? You in there?”

Toujou frowns. Does that voice remind her of anyone?

“I don’t know what’s your deal, but staying in there isn’t going to help.”

Toujou moves from her spot to the door. Then she lightly kicks out against it.

There is a crashing sound preceding a quiet curse and the sounds of feet skittering across the floor. Toujou suppresses a grim smile.

>>>>>

Toujou confirms one more time that everything is set in place. Then she finally opens the door just a little bit and sees Akamatsu.

“Toujou-san, are you finally willing to work with us?”

Toujou shakes her head. “Actually, I was wondering if you guys can get Shirogane-san to me.”

“Shirogane?”

“I think… I remembered something that I want to confirm with her.”

Akamatsu does not at all hide her confusion, but she nods and walks off.

Minutes later, another knock sounds.

“Toujou-san? What is it?”

Toujou wearily gestures for Shirogane to walk in. Shirogane tentatively takes a step in.

“I want you to know that in this time I was isolating myself, I have recovered some memories of my past, and I think some of them involved you.”

“Like, in what way?”

Shirogane follows Toujou a little bit deeper into the small dorm room, nearly to the bathroom. Toujou takes one step into it.

“Oh. Shirogane-san, I just remembered another important thing. Did you ask Akamatsu-san to come in with you?”

“Um, well, actually, she ehh,” Shirogane ruffles her hair. “said that she will be on the outside of the room just in case. Since, you know, with what you did to Iruma-san,”

“That was really nothing. Just my grumpy mood.” Toujou chuckles, casually walking into the bathroom, and

with a smile rivaling that of Akamatsu’s, she

tramples on the power switch of an ultrasonic humidifier,

the one ironically black and shaped like a rose,

releasing the concentrated poison into the air as the mist flows out.

“What is this?...” Shirogane coughs, inhaling a lungful before she starts choking and making noises akin to suffocation.

“Just poison. Nothing serious.” Toujou’s smile solidifies into a grin. “Nothing too strong against a hag like you.”

“A, a what?” Shirogane starts gagging.

“Don’t think I don’t know your role in this, you…” Toujou struggles to think up a good word as her throat starts retching motions. “I suppose this is the true way to end this. As long as you are dead, the killing game will end.”

Shirogane makes a sound almost like another desperate plea before droplets of blood start dribbling down her jaw.

“I… I made my peace with this dirty deed done.” Toujou lazily wipes away the blood dripping down. The copper tang of it is a relief in its own way. “I was never meant to survive, so this is the perfect scenario to end everything. Just you and me dying. The end.”

“You… You don’t know what you’re…” Shirogane collapses onto the floor, knees hitting together as blood starts pouring out at an alarming rate.

[[ **this can finally end. everyone else can live now. finally i have atoned.** ]]

Toujou slowly slides down to the floor herself, laughing, maybe out of delirium and maybe out of unadulterated joy, she herself is not at any discretion to say.

All the blood inside Toujou cascades out from her every orifice, slowly turning colder as it leaks out and joins Shirogane's own,

 

 

 

and then Toujou wakes up in a locker.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you actually did read all the way through I'm so proud of you to make it through this mess. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! And if you like it please kudos and comment! Thank you!


	2. the vessel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> damn, it's been forever since i wrote stuff for this fic again. i kinda lost my steam??? between that and writing unbridled/fangan, i really have neglected this fic and many others lol
> 
> anyway i hope you enjoy it!! the fic might read a bit incomplete around the end... for reasons? who knows!

Kiibo takes in a scalding breath. As a robot, he has no actual need for oxygen, but the human-like action is the only thing of his head that could adequately prepare himself for what he is about to do. What he is about to end.

He takes into the air again, all components that make up the prison school of despair shrinking into pins as he flies ever higher. Then he activates the cannon on his right hand and watches everything burn.

There’s a mortifying moment when he thought he wouldn’t watch the mastermind, the marionette dropping dead like a fly, but then he detects the blood spatter under a huge slab of rock alongside the splintered head of Monokuma, and can quite make sure that the main objective is reached.

… Other than rescuing them, of course.

Smiling a brilliant smile that no one will get to see, he softly presses on his self-destruct button and flies all the way towards the horizon, right into the rain of shards

  
  


and then Kiibo wakes up.

>

Kiibo swats away Ouma’s hand for the millionth time. The supreme leader―or perhaps, more like supreme annoyance―only to continue showing him the ever-wide Cheshire Cat’s smile at him, and Kiibo pretends he is reading something important on his Monopad.

“Hey Kiiboy, mind showing me your best rocket punch?”

“For the last time, I have no such function, and I would like you to stop telling me to do absurd things that I’m not capable of.”

“Whaaaat?” Ouma sticks their face flat onto the table and rolls their head around the fringes of the table, a folded pout on their face. “But you are the Super High School Level Robot! How could you have no advanced equipment like a cannon or rocket fist or a di―”

“Stop―stop that right there!” Kiibo attempts to clamp his hand around Ouma’s mouth, but Ouma merely giggles and runs away. Bye-bye! Later!”

Kiibo refocuses back on his Monopad, but realizes quickly that doing so would be in futility anyway. The Monopad gives absolutely nothing away about the present state of this world he now is stuck in, and the growing dread that something is very wrong is not helping.

Kiibo turns off the Monopad and turns to his own memory bank. Right now only the self-introductions of the other students, Ouma and his conversation just now remain imprints in it. There are 3578 GBs left.

The knowledge is somehow much more unsettling than Ouma’s teases.

Kiibo considers everything he knows so far. Shirogane is the mastermind of this killing game. Everyone else acts as they have in the past. He doesn’t have his weapons on him right now, and Ouma is as obnoxious as before.

Everything seems to be conspiring to make him tick and Kiibo does not like it one bit. Does he passively wait for the entire sequence of the killing game to occur one more time, or does he do anything to stop Amami from being killed?

If he lets everything just go on again… Then once again the thirteen of them will die, and Saihara, Yumeno and Harukawa would only have a slim chance of surviving.

 _Maybe, just maybe…_ He can stop Amami from dying based on what he remembered from last time. Wait! Last time Akamatsu is framed when Shirogane is the true culprit… How can he work around it?...

“Oh, Kiibo-kun?”

Kiibo snaps his head up, just in time to catch Shirogane in the eyes.

Shirogane’s spectacles are like barriers, carefully hiding the true words in her eyes.

“What, what is it, Shirogane-san?”

“I was wondering about something… Why are you all alone out here? Is there no one who will spend time with you or something?”

Do you spend any time with someone you already know is the mastermind? Kiibo’s mind skips the question and he yells, “What do you mean, nobody will spend time with me? Are you assuming that since I’m a robot I cannot communicate like a normal teenager?”

“That’s absolutely not what I mean Kiibo-kun! I was just wondering if, in retrospects, that’s what the others assume of you instead? But that’s beside the point! What I really wanna do here is to spend some time with you if that’s the case!”

Does Shirogane know?... Kiibo watches Shirogane’s slight tremble and picks his words carefully. “Shirogane-san, if I might ask… Are you scared or something?”

“Scared? Me?” Shirogane lets out a peal of laughter, filled with fear and uneasiness. “Of course not! I just wanna have some fun with a friend while I still, yanno, can!”

Kiibo can’t help but ruminate over that, picking apart every syllable Shirogane utters in the hope of realizing her game here this time. “If that is so… okay, let’s spend some time together.”

>

Being in physical proximity with Shirogane raises an entirely different kind of unease. Kiibo sharpens his optical sensors unconsciously, focusing on the way Shirogane forms her smile and move her limbs, as if one heartbeat he doesn’t spend looking at her would give her the free reign of hurting anyone, assuming back the role of mastermind and ending everyone and—

“Kiibo-kun? Are you alright?”

Kiibo looks back up at Shirogane, who is giving him a very concerned look. Almost enough to convince him, Kiibo tells himself. “Of, of course, I am. What is it that you need me for?”

“Kiibo-kun, did you forget already? We are gonna hangout like normal kids, and you don’t need to act all uptight for being a robot.”

Kiibo nods a half-hearted nod, but not before making a remark on his own. “That said, I have no idea what Shirogane-san would like to do. So… will you let me know so we can carry out this hangout properly?”

Shirogane laughs, a small wind chime-like laugh, one enough to fool people into thinking she’s harmless. “Well, for starters, would Kiibo-kun like to work with me to organize my costumes?”

“Shirogane-san’s costumes? But I’m afraid I’m not really good with such things—”

“It’s gonna be alright! I’m sure you’ll be a great help, that is, if you want to help!”

Kiibo looks into Shirogane’s eyes, careful enough in a manner that he’s sure that she won’t be able to tell. However, it doesn’t take Kiibo a lot to realize his action would be for null; after all, how could eyes constructed of electronics be able to discern the soul of eyes made of flesh?

“Of course, I would help.”

With that same saccharine smile, Shirogane leads Kiibo to her room in the dorm, and surprisingly enough, left the door open. Kiibo is almost tempted to ask why she would do so when most people normally would just shut the door.

“Okay! So basically what I would need you to do is to put all these costumes according to their colours.”

“Hmm… So I’m taking it that all clothes should be placed in the same pile according to their colour tones. Do I need to separate them by what kind of clothes they are?”

“Hmm, nope! There will be no need for that! Just put all the ones that share the same colours together will do!”

Kiibo nods, starting on the clothes in red. He picks up one skirt, one t-shirt, one… helmet?

Shirogane lets out an embarrassed laugh then. “Sorry if they do look weird… Being a cosplayer means you have to take up so many different kinds of jobs as different kinds of characters, so sometimes it’s inevitable that there would be more unconventional characters! That said, I do understand if you feel too weirded out by this whole thing—”

“No! I’m up to it.” Kiibo looks back down onto the piles of clothes, his face covered with a grim determination. “I can finish this. Don’t worry about me!”

Shirogane looks like she is ready to argue but then concedes with a nod. “I’m so grateful to have your assistance, Kiibo-kun. Then let’s do this!”

“Yes!” Kiibo puts his hands onto the very first piece of article on the pile nearest to him, but before Kiibo’s fingers can truly make contact with the fabric, Shirogane’s smile turns into a soured expression. “Wait! I can’t believe I forgot this.”

“What is it, Shirogane-san?”

“I promised Himiko-san to help her with her magic tricks this afternoon!” Shirogane punches down onto her own clothes, in a manner not dissimilar to the ways girls throw tantrums about their boyfriends by punching them on their chests. “I will have to go! But then, how can I hang out with you… ?”

Kiibo looks at her distressed countenance, and in that action breeds the pity that he knows latently might doom him. “You can go on ahead. I can handle all this.”

“This isn’t a matter on whether you can handle all this, Kiibo-kun, it’s the fact that I promised you we would hangout—”

“And it’s completely okay. Not everyone has the time to spend with each other all the time, right?” Kiibo gives her a brilliant smile or at least a facial expression that looks sufficient enough in expressing approval and joy.

Shirogane smiles then, one smile that doesn’t look at empty. “Thank you so much Kiibo-kun! I gotta be off then!”

“I understand! Have fun!”

>

Kiibo continues on his mission to tame the wild piles of clothes then. Though it admittedly embitters him to a degree that he does end up helping out someone on this kind of manual labour-like errand to carry out, but somehow Kiibo’s own emotion indicator shows no red signal for anger at all.

If anything, he is enjoying himself, having fun in organizing all these clothes and gears for Shirogane.

Kiibo wonders what is the difference that cements his lack of anger? His own best theory is the difference between when Ouma asks him to play and when Shirogane asks him to help; when it was Ouma, he is merely doing that to Kiibo in a way to amuse himself, and it was no form of having fun with friends or doing anything in relation with friends at all.

With Shirogane, however, it was this distant feeling of friendship that takes him to keep going on. The way Shirogane smiles and calls him her friend, the way that—

“A body has been discovered!”

The electrical impulses in Kiibo’s head run into a headlong pause.

What fickle thing trust is.

>

Toujou watches the trial undergo major challenges as most of the students remain resolute and studious in their stances. None can be quite removed from their collective beliefs now.

“There is no doubt that Kiibo is guilty,” Saihara said, albeit with a hint of sadness and pity. “He’s the only one who has been alone around the time of Akamatsu-san’s death, and it would only make sense for Kiibo to be the culprit, as he’s conveniently alone at the site of crime and would have the strength to snap her nec—”

“I would like to raise a grand objection.” A voice echoes through the cavernous trial room. It’s Kiibo himself. Saihara reluctantly lets Kiibo take the stage then.

“It is true that I have been alone by the time of Akamatsu-san’s death, but it would be frivolous to assume that is concrete evidence of me being the guilty party. Think about it; while it’s true that some of us would be alone by ourselves at times, but there could be witnesses for us to testify that we did not stray in our paths and murder another. Me, for example, was helping Shirogane-san to sort out her cosplay costumes when the murder took place. Surely, Shirogane-san herself can agree with th—”

“Huh?” Shirogane mutters, her features carefully arranged to express concern and fear. Toujou notes with dry humour that it almost looks like Shirogane will admit to the murder at any given moment judging by her look. “B—but, uh, Kiibo-kun, I, I uh, I didn’t—”

“That is right, isn’t it, Shirogane-san? That you asked me to hang out and suggested taking care of your costumes! At that time, you were going to—”

“Sorry, Kiibo-kun, but my meaning, I mean, what I mean is that I don’t really know what you mean that I asked you to help to sort the costumes.”

Toujou watches Kiibo’s smile crumble. “What do you mean, Shirogane-san?” He asks quietly, slowly.

“What I mean is that I can’t help you by lying about how you don’t have any suspicions on you at all! This entire afternoon, I have always been helping Himiko-san out with her magic show and that’s it! I have never seen you or talked to you, so how can I prove that you have been helping out in my room and never went off to murder Akamatsu-san?”

All eyes gather on Kiibo’s screaming ones now.

“And anyway, Kiibo-san, even if I have really told you to help me with the costumes, how can I be sure that you have not abandoned it halfway through to murder Akamatsu-san, then goes back out to keep doing the costumes so nobody suspects you? I hope you do realize by now, that I really couldn’t have helped you with anything, much less give you an alibi.”

The thread snaps. “What do you mean you have never asked me to help you? What are you talking about, Shirogane-san? Can’t you remember—”

“I’m sorry, Kiibo-kun,” Tears pattern around Shirogane’s cheeks now, a sickly pallor the kind that you see only morticians and funeral attendants have. “I didn’t think things like that would happen to you. If I have known that you would become like this, I would have done the most I can to help—”

“Why are you lying? Why are you lying about not meeting me—”

“I’m sorry, Kiibo-kun. I would help in any other possible way.”

The last syllable out of Shirogane’s lips falls in with an air of finality, as the entire courtroom spits no more rebuttal or argument, only the quiet heaving noises from Kiibo that nearly resembles sobbing.

 

.

 

Toujou picks up a small scrap of metal that exploded out of Kiibo’s torso just a few moments earlier.

Everyone who had just bore witness to the execution of the first killer among them would agree that it was no fitting execution—for all his faults and wailings, Kiibo simply does not deserve such plaintive cruelty.

In the echoes of this death, however, Toujou has attuned herself to see something else.

  
  


and Kiibo opens his eyes to darkness again.

>>

“Wait, does that mean Kiiboy has the ability to transport through time? Awesome!”

Even as Kiibo remains in the know on what Ouma’s true personality and motivations are, he couldn’t help but feel an intense desire to land a punch on his face nonetheless. “Ouma-kun, I truly have no idea as to why you would feel the need to continuously harass me in this manner. Most everything you have spoken to me so far has no concrete meaning or constructive to what we are trying to do—”

“What we are trying to do? Kiiboy, look,” Ouma leans in, his smile charged with mischief and a hint of bitterness now that Kiibo can inspect upon it even closer. “Don’t you know in the absence of a direct villain, you simply have to create one? It is a long and arduous labour, but most definitely rewarding when it’s done and the game allowed to run normally.”

Ouma’s almost anticipatory glances tell Kiibo not much or relatively enough to give a reaction, but somewhere in Kiibo’s wires, he swears he could almost grasp onto an iota of the meaning with clarity. “... Is that specifically what you’re doing?”

“Hmm?”

“Pretending to be the villain?”

Ouma stares away from Kiibo, and before Kiibo can ask for him to continue Ouma has already run off into the distance, leaving a trail of mischievous laughter too difficult for Kiibo to decode.

Judging by the fact that Ouma has always been the inscrutable liar, but also the one that ended up… Kiibo finds himself struck by an intense pain in his heart, his eyes once again clouded by the imaginary rotten visage of Ouma’s crushed body. He can’t reconcile the image of that one with the Ouma that just ran away from him.

It’s too cruel. And all because of Shirogane and Team Danganronpa’s whims.

_and because of you._

Kiibo has no idea where this voice came from, only the fact that he has to stuff it away somewhere if he hopes to succeed in this loop. If he hopes to stop the game.

>>

Chances, or almost most certainly, Ouma did not trust what he has said about the timeloop. That might have given Kiibo less credibility for talking about such a wild impossibility, but then again nobody believes in what Ouma said anyway. So this time Kiibo has to think carefully about who he wants to be in the know with him.

If he wants anyone to be in the know with him, of course.

He finds his thoughts drifting back to how Shirogane has gotten away with him as well. In the previous loop, he has been naive enough to believe that Shirogane would be a victimized participant like the rest of them, but evidently, she will stay being the ringleader no matter what… That’s some good knowledge to be equipped with, at least.

This time, if he does nothing to disturb anyone, then Akamatsu will die framed for Amami’s murder. If he simply does everything that happened in his original universe… then Shirogane will be successfully outed and he will sacrifice himself to save the trio again.

The last time he attempts any difference, any effort to reverse all these cruel fates, only result in him suffering an equally terrible end. So what must he do? What can he do to end this?

“Kiibo-kun? Are you thinking about something?”

Kiibo snaps out of his inactivity and looks up, and to his dismay, it is Akamatsu who has greeted her. “Can I help in any way? Is it Ouma-kun again?”

“It’s, it’s nothing.” _there’s no way you can tell her. nobody can be told such things_.

_nobody will believe you._

Instead of leaving, Akamatsu takes a seat beside Kiibo, a genuine, wide smile on her face. “If anything happens and you need someone to talk to, remember I’m here, okay?”

 _nothing nothing there’s nothing to be told_.

“I will remember that.”

>>

It’s settled then. Kiibo thought as he watches Ouma joke around with Tenko and earning a heated pursuit from her as a result, watches Harukawa’s disconcerted but forcibly unconcerned face slips up into a smile.

He just has to make everything happen as it did. Surely Shirogane would have nowhere to run in the end anyway, so letting that happen all over again is the only guarantee he has to escape from this loop.

If there’s a guarantee of escape at all.

“Kiibo?”

Kiibo looks up, finding a witch hat in front of him. “Yumeno-san?”

“Shirogane told me she was going to do magic tricks practice with me, but I don’t know where she went. Can you substitute?”

This shouldn’t be happening. Yumeno shouldn’t be proposing that. She shouldn’t be doing the same thing she did the last loop. She should be—

“You know, if you don’t want to, you can just say no?”

Kiibo glances back at Yumeno, who’s clutching her hat lower with a hint of displeasure in her barely concealed eyes.

Not much time to think. “Alright, of course, I can.”

Today’s the day, but nothing’s going to plan already. Kiibo will be replacing Shirogane from the last loop, and everything’s spinning out at the seams of this threaded destiny. Kiibo mindlessly takes up the props Yumeno hands him, with nary a look into Yumeno’s actions at all—

Today’s the day. The day Akamatsu and Amami die. Kiibo scrapes up every notch in his memory bank, desperately, taking in every fragment of what has happened exactly to form this real picture. All he has to do is to make sure he made no move to disrupt the murders.

All he has to do is—

An acuminate blast of noise strikes, tearing through the speakers and filling the empty chamber with the howls and wails Kiibo is sure nobody would ever want to hear. That’s the noise Monokuma made to induce murderous intents. Everything is going just as planned.

Kiibo shuts their eyes and uses whatever is in his capacity to force sleep upon himself. Sleep is, technically still unachievable as it is not yet a feature in his catalogue of functions yet. He will have to talk to Professor Iidabashi for sure—

_—wait. professor iidabashi? you still think that person exists?_

Kiibo grits his teeth. Nevermind the sleep function. After all, all he has to do now is to wait through this attack and follow everyone into the library to see Amami dead. That’s all he has to do. That’s good enough.

>>

“A body has been discovered!”

Kiibo opens his eyes, and already the ghostly shadows, the moribund visage and bloodstained green hair dance on his sensors. Kiibo shakes his head violently, gets himself up and runs alongside the few people who have most certainly just run out of their tactic discussion room.

“What’s that broadcast? Somebody died?”

“Damn Kiiboy, did you dust your ears today? Or whatever is the equivalent of your ears? Of course somebody has fucking died for this broadcast to be out!” Ouma answers in a rush, never once forgetting to pick the most scurrilous words while doing so.

“Ouma-san! I would suggest you stop your rude words! Kiibo-san, please ignore him in turn!” Tenko grabs onto Kiibo’s wrist then, effectively dragging him along. Kiibo gets himself running, ready to suffer the sights—

“Did somebody die or something?”

Kiibo glances to his right and finds the inquirer to be a corpse. Or who might have been the corpse with bloodstained green hair.

Amami?

“Damn Amami-chan, I didn’t think you’re just as dumb as Kiiboy! Of course somebody died!” Ouma did not even deign to give Amami any more responses then, just carries on rushing back up in the lead of everyone else.

Kiibo swallows his inquiries and fears and follows everyone into the corner of the library—

—and finds a black cap coated in blood.

>>

“But where exactly did Saihara’s corpse go?”

Shirogane frowns, her composure barely together. Her hands are busy fidgeting, sometimes pushing her glasses back up and sometimes swaying around before gathering around each other again. “We’ve been looking everywhere, but there’s no secret compartment or trapdoors.”

“Obviously somebody moved the corpse, but who could it be?” Ouma’s smugly cheerful countenance never once fails, still a picture of utter calm and mischief. “From what I think, it is absolutely the killer! Kiiboy, is it you who did it? You’re the only one here who can move bodies with ease, I can imagine!”

The fact that he can only rebuttal and makes no contribution to this impales Kiibo in his hope. “While that might be true indeed, I would like Ouma-kun to think about the fact that I have not been alone and unattended to this time. I was with Yumeno-san in her magic tricks practice.”

“I can confirm that as true.” Yumeno adjusts her hat a little. “Kiibo has indeed been my prop-holder the whole time. There is no way he could have slipped away from my notice.”

“Yumeno-san! You could’ve just asked for Tenko for doing that!” Tenko protests from the other side. “Why ask Kiibo-san of all people?”

“Kiibo is just conveniently there, don’t mind,” Yumeno responds with the enthusiasm of a receptionist on the fiftieth day they have worked there. “Anyway, I suppose that could erase the suspicions on Kiibo then.”

Shirogane nods, her features still twisted in fear and obdurate suspicions. “Alright… If that’s the case, how about we review everyone’s alibis again? We might be able to find out who should be suspected the easiest that way.”

“Right! At least we could clear the suspicions on those of us who are most certainly not the culprit.” Akamatsu slams her hands down the stand, in something that barely resembles excitement. “I will say first for those who couldn’t recall. I was on the patrol with Saihara-san. He told me that there was something he needed to check out around the time the broadcast began and left after telling me to stay put.

“I haven’t left it this whole time, and I was continuously checking out the walkie-talkie to make sure he can call for me if he needs help…”

A haunting silence echoes across the courtroom. Kiibo finds the ground very interesting all of a sudden.

“Anyway, that’s the rest of my alibi. Anyone else?”

Yumeno puts up her hand. “I would also like to repeat mine and Kiibo’s alibis in case anyone suspects us again. Around fifteen minutes before the broadcast began, Kiibo and I were practising magic tricks. Though I must say Kiibo hadn’t been the greatest help, seeing he was only holding props for me at different intervals, it is still true that neither of us had ever once left the room we practised in, namely the classroom next to the cafeteria.”

Classroom next to the what? Kiibo could feel the inquires boiling deep inside his metaphorical stomach, about to leak out in stutters and frowns he shouldn’t make if he hopes to survive this loop.

“Okay, I suppose that could mean Kiibo and Yumeno are absolutely on the clear unless they conspired to murder Saihara,” Toujou concludes with an air of ease or something that resembles ease at the very least. “I believe there were quite a few of you who have a tactic meeting instead?”

“Indeed we have. Seeing that’s the case though, wouldn’t it be easier to sort out who didn’t attend instead?” Ouma leans out and takes a look at virtually everyone around. “Kirumi-chan, Ryouma-chan, Rantaro-chan, and me!”

Looks like it would be better to discharge his memory banks and just run with whatever now.

“Amami-chan and I were making food in the cafeteria, that’s our alibis!”

“That’s not quite the whole fact, Ouma-kun,” Amami interrupts with a wave of his hands and a small smile of defeat. “Technically speaking, I was going to put in the trap I myself have set to capture the mastermind. Before I could finish though, Ouma-kun came in and informed me, or rather, dragged me out of the library and into the cafeteria to help make him some food. The two of us have been there since then, and it was before the broadcast began.”

Akamatsu looks towards Toujou and Hoshi. “That would leave you two. Did you guys happened to be together as well?”

“Quite unfortunately for both of us, I suspect we were both alone during the murder and the broadcast.” Toujou takes a pause, and a slight shift in her demeanour takes place. “With that said, do we have a precise measurement of when exactly did the murder take place during the broadcast? The broadcast has been as long as thirty minutes after all.”

“No offence intended, of course, Toujou-san, but if you don’t mind answering…” Shirogane gulps, sounding like she is about to choke on her own words before they could come out. “... What are you doing during this time?”

“Since both Hoshi-kun and I have been alone during this time, I am under the impression that it would not do much for us to disclose such information.”

Toujou and Shirogane stare at each other for what feels like an eternity then, an impromptu staring match that cuts down on everyone else’s train of thoughts. Akamatsu casts a helpless look at everyone else, but none, even Kiibo himself, quite dares to meet it.

“Toujou-san, I think both you and Hoshi-kun should tell us what you were doing nonetheless. You might think that it would be unprovable, but the fact is what you have done might still leave tangible evidence once you’re done with it, right?”

“I cannot quite speak for Hoshi-kun on that, but nevertheless I do not find that to be important to what we’re doing. Everyone only needs to know the result, that neither of us has a reliable alibi. We should move on.”

“Right.” Akamatsu cuts in, earning her a somewhat heated gaze from Shirogane. Shirogane stops doing that as soon as she realizes the speaker has been Akamatsu. “If Shirogane-san doesn’t mind, I do think we should contin—”

“Just one more thing before we go on, Akamatsu-san, if you don’t mind?” The shine in Shirogane’s eyes doesn’t look so innocent again. Akamatsu opens her mouth to argue, but that only ends in giving a defeated nod of approval instead.

“Okay. There’s only one more thing I want you guys to consider before we discuss further on other factors and stuff, and it’s the fact that neither Toujou-san or Hoshi-kun is willing to disclose what they have done during this time period. And that makes them particularly suspicious…” Toujou looks as if ready to argue again, but Shirogane gives her no room to intercept. “Especially when you consider the fact that Hoshi-kun has said nothing so far.”

Everyone’s gaze falls down onto Hoshi.

Kiibo clenches and unclenches his hands, almost starting to feel pain at the frequency of his fingers hitting the insides of his palms. How can Hoshi be connected to this? Amami is supposed to die, Akamatsu is supposed to reveal a tearful—no, _Saihara_ is supposed to reveal a tearful story behind Akamatsu’s motive, and that’s how everything should go in order to achieve that ending again!

But nothing is working. The detective everyone desperately needs is dead.

After what feels like millennia, Hoshi speaks.

“It was me.”

Toujou’s face scrunches up from a stone-cold poker face into that of a defeated person in denial, shaking her head gradually more violently. “No, no you can’t do thi—”

“Toujou, I appreciate you trying to help and making this as painless as it could be, but the fact is I have done it and I should admit that.” Hoshi stands straighter in an attempt to appear taller and lean out further on the stand, clutching his chest while doing so. “It was me all along. I only did what I have to.

“When I found Saihara stooping around in the library yesterday, I know it won’t take him long to realize what’s wrong with this killing game, and I can’t have that happen. That’s why I have to kill him. And as to where I moved his body…” Hoshi sputters a little, a small cough erupting from his small frame. “... That’s easy. I shredded his body into that machine for grinding meat. I was nearly glad that the water didn’t turn too rancid when I dumped the remains into that small river nearby.”

A wave of nausea hits everyone quite immediately, and while everyone’s busy getting the image out of their heads, Akamatsu presses on. “But why did you have to do it? Are you a traitor to the mastermind or something? You couldn’t be the mastermind, because if you were you wouldn’t be hiding for that long.”

“You are right. I am no mastermind, nor am I any traitor.” Hoshi takes in a deeper breath, his left hand rolling on his chest insistently. “I simply have to do that… To…”

Then Hoshi drops backwards, a puddle of blood exploding in a stream from his lips before he hits the ground.

>>

Toujou’s composure no longer exists. She’s broken down crying, her gloved hands covering her face as Shirogane continues her grand deduction.

“And the reason why Toujou-san is so insistent on not telling anything, and Hoshi’s painful expression and the fact that he just dropped dead with blood spitting out… Toujou-san, you poisoned him to help him escape the execution, isn’t that so?”

Toujou said nothing, merely gives a nod. Gasps spread across the courtroom again.

“Well, since Hoshi-kun is already dead…” Akamatsu turns to Monokuma, who has been surprisingly quiet during this entire trial. “Does that mean you will still punish Toujou-san—”

“Are you kidding me here, Akamatsu? You really think I won’t?” Monokuma springs from his seat in a fit, crashing into Monotarou on the way. “I _have_ to find someone to be punished! It’s necessary every damned time!”

“So, let’s begin the execution for Toujou Kirumi, Super High School Level Maid!”

Kiibo shuts his eyes.

>>

“... Kiibo?” Akamatsu’s soft voice drifts into Kiibo’s consciousness. “Are you alright?”

Kiibo opens his eyes once more, and the courtroom has vanished into the darkness. He should be in the infantry now.

“Kiiboy is sooooo weak-willed! Especially for a robot!” Ouma’s weirdly cheerful countenance pops into Kiibo’s periphery of sight, much to Kiibo’s annoyance. “I didn’t think a robot would faint at the very sight of a corpse, an announcement of death no less! I wonder if Kiibo could survive this killing game along with us alpha survivors?”

“Ouma, if there’s nothing kind you can say, I would highly recommend you shut your mouth.” Akamatsu shoots Ouma a dirty look, then shifts her attention back to Kiibo. “Kiibo, I’m sorry this has to happen. None of us would like to see that, and surely we will all do the most we can to ensure it won’t.”

“Akamatsu-chan, it sounds awfully cute and naive of you to assume that this could be prevented, don’t you think?” Ouma continues. “Somebody who appears as decent as Toujou-chan is suddenly capable of helping another natural-born killer by poisoning them before they could be executed, only to get themself executed when the time comes. If absurd things like this could happen, then surely there will be even more absurd murders. We couldn’t hide from all these trials.”

Akamatsu turns back towards Ouma, momentarily forgetting how she was supposed to comfort Kiibo. “And so we keep on letting all these happen? Simply due to a lack of will to combat against Monokuma and his bull? Should we lie back, do nothing while others fall to the whims of despair and hurt one another? I’m sorry, Ouma-kun, but I simply cannot be comfortable in that same kind of mindset.”

A deathly silence fills into the gaps of their words, neither quite capable of continuing all of a sudden.

The words buried deep in his heart drive surge out of his lips. “Akamatsu-san is right, but I don’t think that means Ouma-kun is to be completely ignored.”

Both of them look at Kiibo in confusion. “What do you mean by that?” Akamatsu asks.

Kiibo takes in a deep metaphorical breath. “What I mean is that we do have to work together the best we can to ensure that nobody else suffers this similar fate, but at the same time we cannot easily treat everyone as equally trustworthy. Toujou-san’s tragedy already tells us enough, that not necessarily everyone would appear to be as honest as they seem to be at first glance. We have to take that into account while doing our best to ensure order and peace.”

Akamatsu and Ouma both have a somewhat more softened look at Kiibo then, seemingly no longer affected by their contradictory anger.

“You are right,” Akamatsu speaks first, then she gets up and turns for the door. “With that said, it’s really late now, so I suppose I will have to take my leave. It would be best for you, Kiibo-kun and Ouma-kun, to make your returns back to your rooms as soon as possible as well.”

“That’s what I intended!” Ouma jumps down from the stool he has just managed to balance on. “Let’s leave together!”

Kiibo gets off the bed before he could stop himself as well. “W—wait for me!”

>>

With the potential to change his fate in his hands, Kiibo has forfeited before he could realize that.

“Kiibo-san? Do you have any input?” Tenko’s words penetrate Kiibo’s mess of a mind, wrenching his consciousness back from a sense of despair. “What do you think we should do now that we have… no more floors to explore.”

“Excuse me but… what exactly is it that we have to do again?”

Tenko releases something like a groan, before catching herself. “Okay, let me recap that for you, Kiibo-san. Remember how we gain new floors and talent labs to explore every time we pass a class trial? We have passed three now, but in the three floors we have opened there are only talent labs for the students who are already dead. So what do you think we can do here?”

Memories flood back into Kiibo. “Oh. Right. I think that in this case, we—”

_who are dead again? do you even have any time to remember?_

“—should explore everywhere in those talent labs, just in case we have missed any minute detail that could help us in realizing who is the mastermind.”

_but you already know, don’t you? so why are you lying? why aren’t you helping them as you should?_

“That sounds reasonable enough.” Tenko looks across the ground as if any clue would tear its way out from the ground anytime soon. “With that said, Kiibo-san, I would prefer it if you can help me check out Yu—Yumeno-san’s room, so I don’t have to.”

Yumeno’s moribund complexion flashes across Kiibo’s optical sensors. “I, I will. I promise.”

Tenko smiles. How long has it been since she had? Kiibo doesn’t even remember Tenko smiling in any of this. Ever. Smiling is a myth in this damned killing game televised for entertainment.

Kiibo takes a hesitant step, then a determined step into the talent lab adorned with ribbons and props he has once held.

>>

“It really was you all along?”

Tenko’s heartbroken sobs break through into the courtroom in that question, and Akamatsu shakes her head dejectedly.

“No… I did not intend this! This has never been my idea!” Akamatsu crouches down on her stand, face covered by calloused fingers and bleeding palms. “I didn’t do any of this out of my free will! I was threatened! I—”

“ _You are threatened?_ How are you threatened when you have sold us out ages ago?” Tenko is nearly leaning all the way out, her rage palpable in her tensed stance. “You have been the traitor that murdered Saihara all that time ago, and you have the audacity to keep making excuses for yourself?”

Ouma is surprisingly quiet. Kiibo could not find the resolve to intercept at all, and the rest—Amami and Shirogane—are not any better.

Monokuma gets up from his seat in a mess of movements. “So, let’s begin the execution for Akamatsu Kaede, Super High School Lev—”

“No!”

Monokuma’s head turns towards Kiibo, in a mechanical manner that almost unsettles him. “How important are your opinions that you feel the need to interrupt in this manner, Kiibo-kun?”

_there. you finally made a move? who would’ve thought you’re still capable of that? remember that time ouma keeps teasing you about—_

“I know who the mastermind is, so I have no intentions of letting that emotional torture on all of us continue any further!”

Monokuma releases a low chuckle. “Oh? I couldn’t believe Kiibo-kun finally cheats and gets information on this killing game himself? May you perchance tell us who, or what exactly have pushed you all into this then?”

“It was Shirogane-san!”

A tremor shakes through the courtroom, in tandem to the revelation Kiibo made to the others. The rocking motion starts to intensify, and soon there are cracks in the walls.

“Wait—” Before Kiibo could finish his inquiry, he finds himself stuck. Floating, to be precise, and stuck in this floating motion and in a space he doesn’t understand.

“Why is this happ—” Kiibo desperately attempts to grab on anything, but nothing seems to exist in this space, other than him—

—and Shirogane.

“Sorry I have to end this round like this, Kiibo-kun! If there’s a more delicate method of doing so, I promised I would have opted for that instead!” The sickly cheerful smile never leaves her face.

“What round are you talking about? What do you mean you have to end anything? You…” Kiibo’s mechanical vocal cord unfetters no more sound from that moment forth, and all he could see before everything ends is a casual wave from Shirogane.

 

.

 

Toujou looks down on the others before the execution begins. Most could not meet her eyes, and others try not to glare daggers at her but fail.

Only Kiibo has his eyes shut. Precisely speaking, the moment her imminent death is announced, Toujou couldn’t help but notice the way Kiibo instinctively shuts his eyelids.

>>

Kiibo ends in a way that offers zero resolution on the game he did not agree to play

  
  


then Kiibo opens his eyes to a group of students with curious eyes.

>>>

Okay. He has to strategize seriously and absolutely the most he can this time. Attempting to let everything happen in the order they used to only pushed more people to die and broke other people’s hearts.

Not to mention, even if it is true that Shirogane is the mastermind behind every round, it appears that just pointing her out directly won’t help either. It must be done in a class trial, just like last time

_how long ago was ‘last time’?_

so that she will stand down and accept defeat.

Very dangerous thoughts these are. Speaking of thoughts, the “inner voice” of his seems to have disappeared entirely. While Kiibo knows his memory banks have become defunct long ago, there is still zero mistake in the fact that since the loops have started, no more audience participation has interfered with his own decision-making.

This is a game intended just for him, and it’s one that Kiibo knows he has been losing on. One that he is always on the verge of losing.

The only way to live through that is to unite everyone, gain their trust and to push them against Shirogane the most he can. In the most unfortunate case where Saihara dies again, Kiibo has to make sure he has the ability to tear off Shirogane’s mask himself.

>>>

“Thank you so much for doing this with us, Kiibo-kun! That’s a great deal of help!”

Kiibo smiles shyly, or in a manner he hopes is shy. “It’s nothing! Honestly, I wasn’t really good with technology, so I was worried that I would mess this up instead…”

“But this right here proves that you are just fine and a great assistance to us!” Momota chimes in excitedly. “We’re gonna rely on you a lot, genius!”

_rather presumptuous of you to call a survivor who doesn’t know how to survive a genius_

Kiibo nods, smiling to the best of his abilities. “I will most certainly do the most I can manage!”

>>>

“Kiibo-san! Do you have any free time?”

Tenko rushes up to Kiibo, and it takes everything in Kiibo not to scream  _i_ _know himiko is dead and i am so sorry that’s completely my fault—_

“Sure I do. What is it you require of me?”

“No need to sound so formal, you know? But anyway follow me!”

With Tenko in the lead, Kiibo follows her into an area Kiibo himself can’t recall.

_there’s very little you can recall, almost as if you rather forget all these—_

And in it, a swimming pool with a few rather fancy-looking beach beds propped up next to the pool.

“What? What is this, Chabashira-san?”

Tenko points to the pool with excitement in her eyes. “I asked Toujou-san to help us prepare this! Since both you and I love swimming pools, I figure we could have some fun here!”

… A swimming pool? For both her and—

_—a most unworthy fool—_

“S—Sure, Chabashira-san.” Tenko’s smile is way too kind and expectant to reject. Images of deaths and bloody smiles won’t leave his head, but Kiibo simply finds himself unable to reject such a nice invitation.

Toujou walks in and stations herself to the side of the pool.

“Toujou-san? Do you wanna join us too?” Tenko walks up to Toujou, tugging on her sleeves like an excited child.

Toujou looks to the side, an sense of… vacancy in her eyes. “No, I’m fine by my own. Thank you for the invitation, Chabashira-san.”

_you didn’t even have the courage to see her die_

“Toujou-san? Do you have anything else you need to attend to though?”

Toujou seems shocked by the question, but she answers nonetheless. “No. But…”

“If it’s possible, I think you should stay with us!” Kiibo reaches out, an inviting gesture he hopes is enough. “You don’t have to keep stressing yourself out with everything else! Come and have fun with us a bit!”

Mild surprise shadows Toujou’s face, but she nods and sits onto one of the beach beds. “I suppose I will be fine just sitting here then.”

>>>

There’s some thinking he has to do again.

While that one occasion of Tenko inviting him to have fun is nice and all, there’s something he can’t quite figure out regarding Toujou.

… Right. It was her composure. Kiibo vividly recalls the look in Toujou’s eyes and her movements, how sloppy they have become compared to her when she used to be the second murderer.

“Kiibo-kun?”

Kiibo abruptly looks up, his movements must’ve been too fast for he looks up to a rather shocked expression of Akamatsu. A hint of bitter happiness creeps into him. _well, at least you definitely know how to identify human emotions now._

“It could be just my mistakes but… there’s something wrong I feel like I’ve been noticing on you.”

Kiibo wills his mouth to form a smile. “What could possibly be wrong with me? I have no idea what do you mean by that.”

“Again, it could be just my hunches, and there isn’t exactly anything to support it so far… But,” Akamatsu takes a seat next to Kiibo, looking down on the ground as he does. “I feel like you’re pushing yourself to help us so much, but at the same time you don’t really connect with us at all, Kiibo-kun.”

A prick of unease delves into Kiibo. “Oh, is that so? I’m sorry if I come off that way. I suppose my functions aren’t quite good enough to exhibit—”

“That’s definitely not true, Kiibo-kun!” Akamatsu stands up, swinging fists right in front of him. “It’s absolutely not true that you don’t exhibit enough emotions or anything! We know you are capable of love and feeling things the way we do. Don’t listen to what Ouma-kun might have told you!”

_what ouma could have said about you? nah, akamatsu, you’re the one who got it wrong if you assume that—_

“Thank, thank you for that, Akamatsu-san… But I’m really doing just fine!”

_the more you talk with only bring more troubles—_

“If I have any trouble I won’t hesitate to let you guys know if you can help! Really, I won’t—”

_right, none of you would understand this anyway, so of course to uphold that is to not inform you, not tell you anything—_

“So don’t worry about me!”

Akamatsu puts down her hands back to her sides.

“I see. I will not bother you anymore then.”

The temptation to say everything is strong, but not as strong as Kiibo’s pains.

>>>

Both Saihara and Akamatsu live this time. Perfect. The chance to strike is finally here.

Shirogane is disclosing on what she has done during the investigation before the final trial, and Kiibo no longer feels surprised at the fact that she seems so familiar and articulate with every minute detail.

“Chabashira-san, do you have any—”

“No, I don’t have any of whatever you’re thinking.” Tenko is hugging herself. “Don’t even try asking me.”

“O—Okay,” There’s a visible trail of sweats down Shirogane’s left cheek, which Kiibo nearly find hilarious. “So, does anyone else have anymore contribution—”

“Of course I do,” Saihara speaks up, with a tone that has surety Kiibo has heard before. “From what Akamatsu-san and I have observed, there are—”

“Wait a second there,” Shirogane’s voice intrudes once more. Kiibo grits his teeth and waits. “Kiibo-kun didn’t say much yet. Is he okay?”

“What is this, another attempt to—” Kiibo catches himself before he could finish the question, fortunately, though it has earned him some confused stares. He resumes. “I am alright. I merely did not say much due to the fact that I wasn’t as capable of searching for any clues while battling the Monokumarz. I am otherwise alright.”

“Are you really alright? Or…” A shadow falls across Shirogane’s glasses. “Could it be… you were too scared to say anything?”

_i’m definitely too scared to say anything to y_

“I find it foolish of you to theorize in that manner, Shirogane-san,” Kiibo is running out of words. “If simply not speaking is a possible criterion of being the mastermind, then—”

“Don’t get me wrong, Kiibo-kun! I was simply worried.” The features on Shirogane’s eyes are demanding to be rearranged. Preferably not by him.

“Right. If that’s the case, I would prefer it if we can begin this trial again.” _remember everything that could be used against her. it’s your only chance._ “For starters, when we find the memory flashlights in the—”

“Memory… Flashlights?” Kiibo’s head swivels to the direction of the voice. “What memory flashlights are there?”

_toujou?_

“The, the memory flashlights that you guys found in the—” _in the what?_ Kiibo’s memory banks could not provide any factual information on that. “In the room where Himiko—”

“Himiko? Yumeno-san? What are you talking about, Kiibo?” This time it’s Tenko’s confused eyes that aim a strike across his face, an undercurrent of displeasure and rage mixed together. “Yumeno-san has been dead since, since the fourth trial!”

_what? what’s happening to me—_

All those memories Kiibo has held dear to him, are they all obsolete now? Has he ever held them tight enough?

Or, could it be…?

“Hmm, it looks like Kiibo-kun isn’t in any condition to keep up.” Akamatsu sighs, but the determination in her eyes did not once burn out. “We will all have to work harder in his stead!”

_no, i can_

“We will have to end this right here so no more people have to die!”

>>>

“So it was you the whole time.”

Amami gives an indignant nod at Saihara’s statement. “You can say that, yes.”

“Why… Do you have any explanation for your actions?”

Kiibo watches this unfold. To his credit, he’s not having any more fits exploding from any voice or entity that also shouldn’t exist in him, but the temptation to simply fall apart is growing stronger by the moment.

“But there’s still a traitor among us to ensure this would work perfectly, right?” Akamatsu’s rage-filled tears stop. “Who was that? You should let us know while you’re at it!”

“I thought you all already know that? The one always forgotten by you all, even now, as you all quarrel with zero input from them.”

_here is where you fit in as the puzzle piece. it’s you, you who have broadcast this killing show to the public as entertainment._

_But how could I be if the inner voice—_

“Toujou-san?”

Panic skitters across Toujou’s face for a moment, but it passes as she lowers an octave in her voice. “What… What could possibly clue you in like this?”

Akamatsu and Saihara’s lips are still moving, but none of the words pouring out are making sense to Kiibo, or Toujou for that matter. But the other cruel fact is that these are making all the sense to everyone else; to Tenko with her eyes wide in realization, to Amami with a furious countenance right back to—

— _why_ is his memory bank empty?

“I didn’t, I didn’t…” Toujou is hanging her head lower, a sign of defeat written across her slumped composure. Akamatsu and Saihara’s words won’t yield or waver. Neither is the other’s minds. “Not this again! Please!”

_what why how why why w_

This is not how you want it to end.

“I’m sorry, everyone,” Toujou’s tears push Kiibo’s limits to a different dimension, as Kiibo looks up and sees Toujou in the grips of the execution machine.

Game over.

  
  


then Kiibo finds himself in the midst of a group of teens.

>>>>

What has even happened as Amami and Toujou got dragged off to execution?  

Kiibo could no longer find any use for his own wires. What even runs in those electrical impulses? Thoughts on how to end these loops, or simply relishing the fear he should not have felt in the first place?

And the occurrences surrounding how he has forgotten everything… was Shirogane pulling the strings from behind again? What is the purpose of these games where he could never win?

Kiibo smashes a fist into the wall. Before he could feel pain, he could hear the gasps from onlookers. Precisely, one onlooker.

“Kiibo-kun? Are you hurt?”

Kiibo nearly could not hold in the scream in time, looking up at Toujou’s lively complexion and thin lips curved downward in worry.

“Toujou-san? What are you doing here?”

Toujou’s frown deepens, but her tongue loosens. “I was simply worried for your state of being, Kiibo-kun. I was just back from performing various requests from the others, so I thought I could check up on you now that you are the only one I still haven’t served. So… Do you have any request for me in particular?”

“No, I don’t think so, why would I—”

_whatever you do don’t remember how she looks when she_

“—require anything from you, Toujou-san?”

Toujou almost looks hurt. “Kiibo-kun, you might have had carried the misconception that I only serve your humane… peers. I assure you right here, that is absolutely not true. I do my absolute best for everyone here, every time I come back—”

“That’s not what I mean,” Words struggle to form on Kiibo’s lips, but before he could commit himself back to the mental chore of talking properly, Kiibo notices something.

“Toujou-san… What were you referring to when you said every time?”

Toujou’s face seems paler somehow. “I… I did?”

“You said it yourself just now, how ‘every time’ you just wanted to help all of us. Precisely speaking,” Kiibo narrows his eyes. “You said ‘every time I come back’. Isn’t it so?”

“I said no such thing, you must have mistaken—”

“Are you trapped in the loops too?”

>>>>

After settling down in the cafeteria with a warm cup of tea he won’t drink, Kiibo perks up everything he has to take in Toujou’s undoubtedly sad tales.

“Yes, in what I think you do mean, I am trapped in these loops just as you. With that said though, I don’t see how you can easily see through to this fact just because I slip on how I pick my words just now.”

“On how I pick you up as the same as me?... Well,” Kiibo takes full advantage of how his memory banks are no longer working up like the last loop. Even so… nothing is coming up as for real.

A question floats up Kiibo’s mind instead. “On the contrary, how come you believe me when I talked about the loops? You could’ve easily assumed I was merely talking nonsense the whole time, even including when I asked about how you said ‘come back every time’ like just now.”

“I remembered what you said in the loop where I died because I helped Hoshi-san to die.” Toujou takes a tentative slip out of the tea as if afraid that taking it in huge gulps would result in something bad. “You also said a ‘this time’ when you gave them your alibi… So admittedly I have already had my suspicions for some time. But in a killing game where you have no idea what is going to happen next, you can only become even more cautious while choosing your steps in a broken record version of one.”

Kiibo looks back at the tea, a calm surface of nothing contained inside a rusty cup. _huh, interesting you would look at a cup of tea that way? could it be, you’re projecting yourself onto it?_

“But even so, Kiibo-kun,” Toujou dejectedly puts down her cup. “How do you think we can help each other in our current states at all? In the original game I remember dying in the second trial, and in all the loops I have experienced so far I don’t recall going ever further than a second trial. If you have, do you by any chance know what happened?”

_right. she doesn’t_

Kiibo sighs, and starts detailing what he could still remember about the entire killing game to the extent of his memories.

Toujou’s face considerably flares up when he got to the part on the mastermind. “So it really was Shirogane and absolutely nobody else… I knew it.”

“You knew it? But how would you know that when you’ve always died way before the mastermind is revealed?”

Toujou frowns, not in a way that invites further conversation. Kiibo drops it. “Anyway, I guess both of us are on the same boat. At least it’s better to know we are not alone in this matter.”

“I can’t find any optimism in this matter as you, Kiibo-kun,” Toujou stares down on the ground. “I’m not saying that meeting you makes it any worse, but we’re stuck in these endless loops for no reason whatsoever. Sure, you might know what exactly it is that caused the killing game in the first place, but there’s still no explanation on to how all these loops could occur. It’s meaningless. I don’t know how…”

No more words are spoken then, a wave of silence unfolding between the spaces they occupy. Toujou is entirely right on that. There’s no end or a breaking point in the cycle yet.

How could they hope to leave? How dare they hope to leave?

“Toujou-san, if you don’t mind me asking… Is Shirogane really always the final boss in your loops?”

Toujou looks back up to him. “Is she always the final boss? Hmm, in several of my loops, she did appear to be innocent and knows nothing on the Team Danganronpa business… but like you’ve just confirmed, I think it’s just a general fact that she is absolutely always the one to start the whole thing each loop.”

“But, in one loop I could remember, it’s different for me,” Kiibo continues. “There was this one time when Shirogane specifically appeared only to me in a dimension that I don’t understand, and she was talking about how I wasn’t playing fair or something. I still am not sure what she means by that, and I am afraid…”

“That it will happen again?” Toujou sighs, a look of pity on Kiibo’s panicked countenance. “Well, your concern is definitely not unfounded, but as much as I want to sympathize, I still… couldn’t quite understand the entire circumstances surrounding our situations right now.”

A thought pops up in Kiibo. “Honestly, rather than worrying over our situations… I suppose we should set our sights back onto our current loop at the very least. Maybe try our best to survive together.”

Toujou smiles, at long last. “Yeah, we can try to do that together.”


End file.
